Dean Graziosi Weekly Wisdom #159 - Down Around The Holidays?

ahhh, the Holidays... a special time to create memories for your family.

One Christmas, when my son was about 8 years old, both he and I had the flu- so I couldn't make any plans for us to visit family or friends... it was just him and me... sitting at home... sick. Initially I was feeling sorry for both of us, but then I decided that instead of feeling depressed and helpless, I had to do something about it; so... I rented several movies, bought all kinds of snacks, pulled out the monopoly, and we both camped out in the living-room with vaporizer and all, for two whole days. Needless to say, I had a very special time with my son.
The following year, when I was putting up the Christmas tree, my son said: "are we going to play monopoly and camp in the living room on Christmas? It is our tradition".

... priceless!

Valerie

Every area of life will have challenges, sometimes all at the same time. Knowing the right action to change the situation for all parties involved is hardly precise. Sometimes it works for some and not for others. Sometimes all we can do is appreciate the small things, allow the negative feelings to pass, while trying to find the passion in life.

Be still and know.

Antony

For my husband and I this was the first Thanksgiving without our mothers. I lost my mother 1 1/2 years ago and my husband lost his mom this past spring. The only family I have close is my daughter and grand daughter. My husband has a few family members that live nearby but don't always get along. This truly was a time to start new beginnings and traditions. We invited the family like we do every year for Thanksgiving dinner, and this year to our surprise they all showed up! My husband made a toast to our mothers that are no longer with us and as we were raising our glasses my daughter raised hers and said "and to the mothers that are". The holidays can lay heavy on the heart for the ones you've lost but when you open your eyes to see what's around you sometimes you find out you are truly blessed. I know I am. So here's a toast for the holidays "To New Beginnings and a Better Future for all!"

Thanks for sharing that personal insight. So true. It is never too late to start your own traditions within your own family!

Pat

You are so right about our thoughts creating our life. I know this and yet I still fall into the "poor me" trap once in a while. A few weeks ago I was upset because I couldn't figure out how to change my work circumstances. I finally realized I COULD change how I felt about it, and stop making myself frustrated. It will change; I will work it out.

Your advice is great. Thanks for the help this week. Like you're advising, I'm changing things this month to be ready to go next month.

Laura

Thanks Dean
I also was feeling some what the same way.
But I did the same thing I told my son come on get dressed and he said where are we going. I said out don't care lets just go. And that's what we did got in the car and drove. Well to make short we landed in my brothers house. and we had a beautiful
time.
Thanks Again Dean
PS. To all out there in the DG family may you all have a safe and HAPPY HOLIDAY.

Dean,

Great blog! You are such a giving person and I've always appreciated your sincerity.

Great to hear your Thanksgiving Day went well
after all.

Leilani

Hey Dean. Thanks for your Thanksgiving story. We are glad to see you start your own traditions.

Veronica and I have spent a lot of Thanksgivings with just the three of us. Over the years we have lived far away from both family's but that has not stopes us from having a thankful time. The last few years Veronica's sister Erica moved close by and we started to have bigger get togethers for Thanksgiving.

I remember the thanksgiving of 2006 I had to work at our Lake Tahoe jail. So Veronica and Jessica were home alone. Veronica bought Cornish hens for the bird that year. Even though I was not home for that Thanksgiving it is one we have fun talking about the Cornish hens for thanksgiving.

Dean you and your family are always welcome to come to our home in California for thanksgiving or any day.

God bless you and your family Dean.

Steve and Veronica.

I just wanted to share that sometimes I don't get to view the wkly blog until days after it's posted and so many have already posted there comments. I know your busy and can't read all of them each week-but just once I'd like confirmation that you got a chance to read my comment. These days my mood is changing like the wind-sometimes a get a really good feeling and then something happens to destroy it. I try to remain positive but feel very alone-with noone to talk to when it comes to the real estate stuff. I feel like everyone looks at me like I'm a dreaming and nothing is going to really happen for me. I loved to wake up one day and prove them all wrong!!!!
Thanks for listening
Michelle Campbell

Hello Dean,
I know you read these, and this is my first response. I thought - since your method is assuredly spiritual - that you'd love to read the book Excuses Begone~Wayne Dyer in order to truly understand the power of positive thinking; if not for yourself than for the sake of your students . I'm a student of Philosophy (22 years old) and reading that book was the first step on my path many years ago. Did you know that the power of the mind over the mind body system is enough to cure cancer...and even change your DNA!? Well it's true. At any rate I want to thank you for all your support...I've just begun my business and I'm still hunting after that first deal, but I already know this is what I'll be doing the rest of my life. Take care of yourself, and continue to be excellent!
Ryan

It's true, how we think determines our outcome. During this holiday season, I am being taken to court, and my relationship with my 17 and 19 y/o children is strained. I could easily be depressed, but I am CHOOSING to believe that something good will come out of it, even if it is only that I can control my thoughts and actions and have Peace, which only God can give. Sometimes, it is darkest before dawn, and if we just keep holding on to the Faith, we will see the victory, even when it LOOKS impossible! Thanks, Dean!!!

Dean,

I love that you put a personal example into this weeks video conference. Its very easy for people to assume that their mentors have 100% perfect days 24/7. One of my biggest pet peeves are when motivational speakers fail to point out some of their ongoing challenges. Although, I am sorry to hear that this is a challenge for you during the holidays, it was inspiring to be reminded that you are human:). It makes it seem so much more real....

Thank you!

Beleive it or not you might've made a memory for your son that will carry him into adulthood with his family. Had you kept on in a miserable mood then your son might've picked up on that, and possibly blamed himself for that. Instead you started a life time full of great memories for your son. Which is awesome because I can still remember some of the happy holidays I spent with my family. Thanks Dean for sharring some of your personal stories. Whether you realize it or not it helps, with more than just real estate.

Sincerely: Reginald D.
P.S.: You and your family are always welcome at to come to the Miller home in Savannah Ga.

Thanks for sharing a personal experience, and one that hits home for so many on the holidays. At no other time is there so much hype about it being "the most wonderful time of the year", and yet that is not what so many feel. The essential message - "we control our attitude to our life" - is one to remember all year long. It is not what happens TO us, or AROUND us (we all have things that are not to our liking), but what happens IN us that determines our reality. The stream of well-being is ALWAYS present, no matter what the senses may be reporting to our brain. We have to be courageous and realize we have programmed ourselves in negative ways, and surround ourselves with people and thoughts that contribute to that negative race mind consciousness. It is not always easy, but we are all much more powerful than we realize. We can create all of our moments in a way that reflects what WE want to experience, and it is not dependent on anyone else or what anyone thinks. I love Thanksgiving (had good memories growing up), but no longer enjoy the Christmas season much (due to all the crass commercialism combined with dreary weather where I am currently living), but I stil commit to being joyful on Christmas Eve and Christmas Day, and do not dwell on any negative thoughts, and know that once I move to a warmer, sunnier clime in the winter (as I have experienced in the past), and keep creating the kind of life I want to live, any temptation to think depressing thoughts will be very short-lived. Thanks for the post, Dean, and I am glad you turned things around on Thanksgiving!

Dean - We have something in common - our age. I turn 43 this week. Great blog - you keep me motivated and keep things in a positive mindset for me.

I have been following you for about 2 years now. I have yet to do a deal but am still positive I can make something happen.

By the way, how many peoplo do you work with? I think it would be cool to do a blog on your office, show the people you work with, and what goes on a day-to-day basis. Just an idea.

Thanks,
Kevin

Thank you Dean, I personally needed to hear this today. I have been a bit a down for the past couple of days but this morning woke up and turned the switch on positive. Thats the energy I'm taking with me this week to make things happen and take action to change my life. This is my year starting now. Thank you always for all that you do.

I agree with you 100% Dean. I grew up in a family of 10. Mom was separated and on welfare and unemployment. The brothers and sisters would fight over who gets what and would even today steal the shirt off my back if I wasnt looking. I left home permamtly about 25 years ago and never looked back.

I always look back at how thing were and the bad holidays I had growing up. Now I make my own memories. It may be just me and my dog, and Im not making money yet. but I always go into debt for thanks giving. I always cook a big turkey with stuffing. Cranberry sauce is always home made (grew up on canned). And I always make a lot of fresh pumpkin pies I give to neighbours.

I get dark feelings about the past and have clinical depression but I never allow my family to get in the way of my personnal happiness. They ruined my childhood. But I will not let that control who I am today. My dog is worth more then that.

Thanks for another great inspirational message.

Brian

I enjoy Monday to see your e-mail for this week blog. Dean I always walk away with something to think about or use going forward, by saying that I think of my sister on thanksgiving because that was the day she left this earth. Its took me sometime but now I'm bless to have my kids in my life and the DG Family. For the once that down go to a mirror and smile at yourself and you will feel better. Because there is always someone out there wish that they was in your shoe.
_______________________________________________
We are put to test everyday of are life! but we always make it thought

HI DEAN,

GREAT STORY YOU SHARED HERE. IT WAS SO AWESOME THAT YOU WERE ABLE TO CATCH YOUR SELF BEFORE THE SITIUATION REALLY EXPLODED. MIND SET IS THE MOST POWERFUL THING. WE ALWAYS NEED TO BE AWARE OF WHAT WE ARE THINKING OF

Wow, Dean....this is definitely another awesome Weekly Wisdom blog and one of my new all time favorites! I too have shared in the same family difficulty of trying to have all the family together for the holidays. Forgive me though for getting a little personal as well, but unfortunately though, Dean....its a sad circumstance for me in the fact that my own mother and father dont speak with each other anymore, let alone me as well. And I am very blessed to have my best friend, my grandma in my life, as well as my aunt and uncles as well. So even though I can't get us all together or change them in general, I can still appreciate the family I still have and be thankful for everything else in my life. And I too have had instances where I wake up in the morning of a holiday and dread the fact that I wont be able to have the whole family around for the holidays. To give you an example, and to make a long story short....last year just a couple days before Christmas, I got into a bad car accident and had to stay home on Christmas day with my injuries. This meant not being with my family and being by myself watching tv and celebrating it by myself. The thing is, even though I had no choice to celebrate by myself because I needed to rest and heal, I actually enjoyed myself because I told myself "I'm thankful I'm still alive and God kept me safe" and "I know that if I'm not with them for Christmas, I will surely be with them for New Years Ave. And sure enough, because of the right mentality and positive thinking, I was able to walk again better and was able to be with my family on the 31st. So I totally understand where you're coming from Dean and I am so grateful to have watched this!

I'm really glad to hear that even though you had a rough start in the beginning of Thanksgiving, you managed to turn it around and fully enjoy it with your wife and kids. Btw, I'm sorry to hear that Brody was sick and I hope he's feeling much better. I am really excited about what you have in store for us soon and I'm still working really hard to make first deal happen soon, as well as getting my butt over to the 2012 Edge Event. Thanks again for this AWESOME Weekly Wisdom blog, I definitely took in a lot of good feeling from this and don't mind at all that you shared your personal feelings with this. Take care and I look forward to hearing from you soon!

Andre

Definately done this over and over Dean and you are right it does no one any good. Counting ones blessings can make all the difference and making everyone around you days better. Who doesn't like to be around an optimist!

An Attitude of Gratitude will determine your Latitude my friend. That's as true in life as it is in business. What a great nugget of Wisdom this week Dean! Thanks!

You are hereby invited to the Kaminski household next Thanksgiving. We are isolated in the Beautiful Northwoods of Wisconsin (30 Minutes North of Title-Town, Home of the World Champion Green Bay Packers), far from extended family on most Holidays, or any days. Yes - I totally miss Mom & Dad and the 3-brothers & niece and nephews. That's a bit painful.

But you hit it on the head. The Beautiful Wife, the healthy children (2-girls + 2-boys), AND SHE COOKS TOO! If you've got some or all of that buddy - you've got everything you need!

We're about the same age too. Take me up on the offer. The wife's cooking won't let you down!

Merry Christmas next!

PK
HK Investments

Thanks Dean,

For always sharing very personal issues in your life with us and how you cope! But, if for some reason, beyond comprehension, that you ever feel that way again.... simply log-on here and watch an AVALANCHE! of family, love and absolute gratitude come CRASHING! your way! TRUST ME on this! You my friend are welcome at more dinner tables than Santa Clause! and welcomed as FAMILY!, not one word of realestate be spoken! I sometimes wonder if you really know how many you've really reached!... The Holidays are for shifting OUT of overdrive and taking stock in and giving thanks for the past years harvest!. And the only "opportunities" you should be worried about that you might be missing IS the opportunity to have spent these Holidays WITH family. None of us are promissed tomorrow and there will always be another "Deal". Don't forget this family you created loves you too! Because you jumped down in the "Hole" with us and said "Hey, I know the way OUT! Follow me!" Thank you for the honesty and restoring the hope. Talk to you soon Dean.

Manny

Thanks for being so REAL, Dean, that's what we love about you and your programs ! We are in control of our attitudes in any situation, it is so true ! We have had some sickness the past several weeks, and I just broke my leg on Friday, but we won't let that stop us from moving forward in real estate. (although, I am a bit slower on these dang crutches!) Thanks again for your inspiration and honesty !

Hi Dean,
Thanks you so much for your transparency today. I really needed to hear what you had to share with us. There is a lot of family dynamics going on in my family this year. Mom may have Alzheimer and I want to protect her. From trauma drama. But I find if I try to protect mom the drama can really escalate.

I hope you will share with us even more on this topic and how we can change our attitudes. I just need to remember I am not Jesus and I can not save my mom only Jesus can do that. All I can be is mom's daughter and be there for her when mom needs me.

Dean Now I want to share with you what I have been doing I have called the number on the sign on the building next to my church. and I have called the man who name is on the sign and we keep playing phone tag. After playing phone tag for three weeks he has given me his cell phone. So I am going to give him a call tomorrow if I get home early enough that I do not disturb his family time.

The building is next to my church I really want to help my church get that building as we are growing and we do not have any more room for more chairs. I do not completely know what I am doing , I hope I do not mess up. I heard that the same company has bought the building twice and both times escrow fell though. THe building has been empty for 2-3 years.

I heard that they bought it again and I am hopping that it fell through again. We have been playing phone tag for three weeks the fact that he gave me a cell phone on his last message to me, that tells me that he wants to talk to me. So I need to write down the questions to ask him and then give him a call so I do not sound like I don't know what I am doing.

The last message I left him I told him that I was working on three projects and that I did not have alot of time but I he could call me on my cell phone however I will not have much time to talk as I am over seeing three rehabbing projects. That is that day he called my home and left me his cell phone number. I am not just helping to get my fathers building rehabbed I also am over seeing the 3 units that are being rehabbed.

I do not know what to say or how to do what I am doing, I am just going to ask God to help me with the words and see what your books can tell me what says do.

Today Dean I was working on my father's building . Today was an easy day as I was just taking the chipping paint off of my fathers building. I don't have the resources yet but I am trying to figure out a way I can be apart of your Academy as specially with this station I feel like a real estate baby who cant even crawl yet and I am trying to run a real estate marathon.

You are a real blessing Thank you for your transparency .

Thanks for sharing Dean! First; Did you know that Norman Rockwell actually grew up in an orphanage? So his paintings were all really a fantasy! As a culture we try to grasp onto this fantasy when it really is not a reality for most of us. Like some of the other people on the commentaries, I too had to face the harsh reality years ago, that my family would sooner kick me down than support me.--That is a hard thing to face and say, because we are trained not to hear it or accept this as a fact.-We need to be aware that it is not a reflection on me or us, but a reflection of the system and the people who struggle within them.
So my first awakening was 25 years ago, when my husband, at the time (I only had one,) lost his job. Neither one of us were working and we had a new baby. -I couldn't make it home for Thanksgiving, and I couldn't even get a phone call from my family who were all together for Thanksgiving. This was difficult because Thanksgiving was always my favorite Holiday.
Then 12 years later I went through a messy divorce and realized I didn't have a place to go. Family and friends took sides, and were few. The first year I had my kids as a single mom, I was invited into a new friend's home for Thanksgiving with her family. It was wonderful!! She saw my sorrow, and reached out.
The first year I didn't have my kids, I volunteered to serve Holiday meals at a soup kitchen. It was the most wonderful experience!!(I did this on my Birthday too!) Now I just don't think too much about Thanksgiving. I make due with what I have, and enjoy the time that is given, and share with the people who show up at the time! Thanks Again Dean. Your story is inspiring.

I come from Italian roots and have raised my children by suggestion, as much freedom as I can muster as a mom, and massive doses of TLC.
That's what you do for us, Dean--

So proud. So thankful.

Here's to making traditions, turning stinky thinking into forward thinking, manifesting contentment and self love, so we can give and give
and never, never, never quit!

Happy Birthday Andy!

Happy Birthday Dean!

Love and wishes for abundance to you all--

Tina

Thank you for sharing your heart and being sooo transparent thats one of things I like about you.With you sharing to help others you"re being healed yourself. so often we have those moments of pitty parties feeling sorry for ourselfs but i've leant over the years that pitty parties dont work lol, and like you said you have to snap out of it and pick your self up.when i look over my life and see where God as brought me from, where i should i"ve been but the mercy of God kept me i realized i have no room or reason to complain at all. Dean you"re truly Blessed sometimes we dont undersatnd the things we go though but God as given you a platform to help others to inspire them not to give in or give up. Thank you for all that you do. You just pray to God he's able to put every broken peices back together.

Hi Dean, You are so human.......I am sure you gave your wife a hug before you went to the store to get that turkey!!! And good thing this isn't the "olden days" because the grocery stores used to be CLOSED on Thanksgiving day. Glad you had a Thankful day......so did I. You are awesome. I appreciate you.